HOW TO get THE support OF YOUR pals and family

Updated: 6/21/20 | June 21st, 2020

Once a month, Kristin Addis from Be My travel Muse writes a guest column featuring ideas and recommendations on solo female travel. It’s an crucial topic I can’t adequately cover, so I brought in an expert to share her advice. This month’s column is about taking care of unsupportive pals and family who think you’ll end up like the motion picture Taken.

I swallowed hard as I sat across from her, hoping the news would discuss smoothly. I’d been sitting on the information for months and had finally worked up the courage to tell her.

“Mom,” I began, “I’m quitting my job to travel the world.” I held my breath and wished I could hide behind something while she considered the news.

“How fun!” she replied.

I was stunned.

There was no questioning, no criticism, and no attempt to talk me out of it. I had her support. plain and simple. It was a substantial relief and, now that she knew, I could tell the rest of the world too.

Have you found yourself in the same position? You’re dying to travel the world. You’ve made a decision not to wait until a friend, family member, or significant other can join you because if you did, you might be waiting forever. You’re pumped up for the road ahead, but just one thing looms in your way — telling everyone else in your life that you’re going to be gone for a while, all by yourself, on the other side of the world.

One of the greatest sources of worry people have is breaking the news to pals and family. They may ask you, “What about your career? What about your boyfriend/lease/cat/garage band? must you really be out in this big scary world alone? It’s not safe for women to travel. Aren’t you anxious about ending up like in that motion picture ‘Taken’?”

Their worries are only natural, and it’s best to plan on a mix of reactions, just in case they’re not all completely positive and encouraging like my mother was.

So, when you get negative feedback, how do you deal with their criticisms and concerns? What happens when your pals and family don’t support your trip? What do you do when your parents don’t want you to travel?

Here is my recommendations on how to deal with unsupportive pals and family – and win them over:

Make sure You’re Committed

If you’re not entirely sure about your decision to travel solo, it’ll be much easier for concerned pals and family to talk you out of it. Don’t just come up with a half-baked idea and tell everyone that you might be considering traveling alone.

On the other hand, does the dream of traveling keep you awake at night (in a good way)? Are you a lot more ecstatic about exploring the world than anything else in your life ideal now?

Have you looked into the cost to travel the world?

Are you dedicated enough to save up the required funds?

If so, you’ve likely committed to making your travel dreams a reality. Now, you need to turn your desire into a plan.

Have a solid Plan

Sit down and plan out every detail so that when you encounter doubters you can come back with information to address their concerns. show your pals and family how much time and thought you’ve put into your trip. It’s much easier to put your parents and pals at ease if you have a well-thought-out plan and are absolutely prepared.

Hopefully, also your passion will be infectious, and once they see how much it indicates to you, they’ll be a lot more supportive.

When I asked my mother what made her support my decision so quickly, she responded that she saw how well I had planned my trip and knew from that alone how much it indicated to me and how severe I was about it.

I had shown her examples of other solo travelers out doing the same thing, given her a rough itinerary, and spoke to her at length about what the trip would entail. I had told her the countries I planned to visit, pointed her to the blogs I had been reading, and shared my budget plan.

She got to feel like she was part of it rather than just an afterthought. That put her a lot more at ease.

Be ready for any questions they might throw at you!

Let the Numbers Do the Talking

A girl shouldn’t be out traveling alone; it’s a scary world out there” is a action you’re likely to hear. parents naturally want their child to be safe and often concern that being a woman on her own abroad is a lot more hazardous than it is at home. but the reality is, whatever you’ve done so far in life to stay alive is relevant abroad as well.

I also find it valuable to point out that solo female travel is on the rise — it’s not so odd anymore. A google search on “solo female travel” now yields back millions of results. reports after reports have shown that there is now a shift in the travel industry to deal with solo female travelers.

It’s not just young women who travel solo, the trend has even amplified across generations. This indicates a lot more women-only excursions and a lot more opportunities to meet and connect with other solo female travelers on the road and even online.

Do your research and show your pals and family that you are fully prepared and aware of what you are getting yourself into. assure them that you will not be the only one out there and that you are confident in your decision.

You’re just a Phone call Away

Part of the negative reactions will a lot of likely have to make with your pals and family fearing that they won’t be able to get in touch with you. They may be envisioning jungles and remote places where only old-fashioned snail mail is available. That may have been true 20-30 years ago, but these days Wi-Fi is everywhere. even when it’s not, local SIM cards are easy to find.

It’s also much easier than ever to stay connected with apps that allow messaging, chatting, and video calling for free, such as Facebook, Skype, Zoom, Viber, KakaoTalk, and WhatsApp. too lots of pals and family to update your travels? Share photos and videos on your social media and keep everyone in the loop. It’s also a terrific way to share your happiness and who knows? It might be so infectious that your pals and family would consider doing the same!

International phone plans are also available from T-Mobile without the large price tag. This indicates that anywhere that you can at least get cell reception, you’ll be reachable. You’ll genuinely be just a phone call away during the majority of your trip.

Ask For Their depend on and Support

If all else fails, turn it around. Your parents raised a child with a good head on her shoulders, didn’t they? Ask them, “Don’t you think I’m capable?” If the answer is “yes,” then end the conversation.

If the answer is “no,” then ask for the reason behind the no. chances are they won’t really come up with one — no parent wants to tell their child they don’t think they can succeed.

Males and females both have to look after their safety, and your gender doesn’t inhibit your ability to travel. Do they not depend on you, love you, and want you to live a life that is fulfilling? must they stop you from living your own life?

Chances are when put this way, your loved ones will realize that you’re a capable adult and know not to intentionally do silly things to put yourself in harm’s way.

Remember: It’s Your Decision

It can be pretty disappointing when you’re so ecstatic about the prospect of your big trip, and the most crucial people around you aren’t supportive of it.

When I quit my job to travel by myself, a lot of people were left scratching their heads, anxious I was going through a quarter-life crisis and burning bridges behind me. They just didn’t understand a life outside of the one they were living, and they weren’t comfortable with that kind of risk in their own lives.

I’ve come to realize that when people express a negative viewpoint about the decisions made by others, it’s normally their own insecurities talking.

Worried pals and family are not necessarily a bad thing, though. It indicates that there are people out there who love and care about you, and who want you around. It’s only natural and probably inevitable. In time, as they see you blossom on your trip, having adventures and stunning experiences to last a lifetime, they’ll become a lot more comfortable with the idea.

There are always naysayers, but they don’t have to hold you back from living out your own life. You only get one, and it’s yours to do what you wish. You might as well spend it chasing a dream rather than letting the fears of others hold you back.

***
When it comes down to it, with or without cheers from everyone in your corner, you just have to take the first step, and go.

In the words of Dr. Seuss, “You’re off to terrific Places! Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting, so…get on your way!”

Kristin Addis is a solo female travel expert who inspires women to travel the world in an authentic and adventurous way. A former investment banker who sold all of her valuables and left California in 2012, Kristin has solo traveled the world for over eight years, covering every continent (except for Antarctica, but it’s on her list). There’s nearly nothing she won’t try and nearly nowhere she won’t explore. You can find a lot more of her musings at Be My travel Muse or on Instagram and Facebook.

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